Nexus Biographies


AGant, the Muse Hater

The classic tale of a Moose and his Spy,

The Sun was just rising upon the horizon when Huma and Kessalia were setting up for the Tenko Festival. Both had agreed earlier in the week to grace the Festival-goers with color.

The two stood about, waiting for Princess Neko to show them where to stand, when a rogue ran up and started yelling in what could only be Neo-Kogurian Garble, "DIE ME!!!" For the moment, they stared at him, trying to understand exactly what he was trying to express. He began to jump around them, taking feints with his blade repeating his message. Huma shrugged, he supposed the Rogue wanted to be dead, and was about to invite him out to the Vale.

"Ahh... you wish to be dyed Sir?" Kessalia spoke calmly in the face of this annoyance.

More garbled, "YES PLZ YES PLZ" She glanced at Huma, and his shrug told her he must have meant, "Yes please."

"Alright Sir, what color would you like? I can dye Summer Green, Autumn Purple, Winter Blue, Leather Tan, and Blood red." She smiled.

He spoke his first really understandable words, Huma could tell he was straining to manage them. "I WANT ORANGE!" Huma sighed, some people were so... dense.

"I can't do Orange, Sir. I have already told you the colors I can dye. I dye you one of those colors though." It was obvious even her patience was waning. Huma glanced into the background at something that had caught his interest. A scout from Nagnang was looking at them and then down at his clothes. He too, wished to be dyed, but must have been too shy. Huma motioned him closer.

The scout walked up to Huma, "I wish for you to turn my clothes Green sir, to remind me of Nagnang." Huma smiled and prepared to cast the magic.

The Rogue was still shouting that he wanted orange, when he turned and saw the scout standing in front of Huma, a happy look on his face and his weapons were away. Bloodlust filled the rogue, and he ran the poor scout through where he stood. He grinned at Huma and Kessalia's faces that were aghast and wiped the blood off his Moonblade. He turned to Kessalia, "ORANGE PLZPLZPLZ!!"

Kessalia shouted, "Get lost murderer! I will not dye you for that! I can't even do orange!"

Kessalia then said, "I won't dye you, maybe Huma will. He's standing next to me, ask him."

"MUSES R MEAN! Y DO U HATE ME? Wha..." He was caught off guard and began looking for Huma, who was busy healing the unfortunate Scout. "HUMA IS NOT EVEN IN THE KINGDOMS LIAR! I WOULD NOW! The more he spoke, the more they understood the Neo-Kogurian Garble was stringed with profanity. But... at least they could understand him slightly. The Rogue ran off. Huma and Kessalia laughed, the Rogue certainly wasn't bright.

A few minutes later, Princess Neko welcomed them and showed them to a booth in the Festival. "This is your place, was that rogue giving you any trouble?" They shook their heads. If he came back, they'd handle it.

A line began to form and the two had their hands full, but eventually, there were a lot of happy faces with brightly colored clothes, and no more line. The two began to rise and say their good-byes, when the Rogue appeared again. "U WONT TRICK AGANT AGAIN!" He howled, "THAT IS HUMA! DIE ME!" He pointed at Huma, who sighed.

"And what color would you like?" Huma was through with being polite. He expected the answer and sighed inwardly.

"ORANGE PLZ!" That was -it-... a mischevious plan was working its way into Huma's mind.

"Umm... Sir..." Huma spoke, as if he were reluctant to tell something. "May I ask your name, so that we know each other better?"

The Rogue stared out dully for a moment, then comprehended the question. "AGANT, DIE NOW PLZ, ORANGE!"

"Ahh... AGant," Huma's voice turned friendly, "Now... you should know by now Muses can't dye Orange. But..." He smiled, "I know a path that can."

"REALY?!" AGant's eyes widened, "TELL ME PLZ PLZ PLZ!" The garble was annoying, but if this dimwit fell for it, Huma thought, the pay off would be great.

"Yes, indeed. Have you heard of the Spies?" He whispered, and glanced about, as though someone may be watching. It was getting hard to suppress laughing. Kessalia had already walked off for a moment to get her emotions under control.

"YES YES! I WANT TO B A SPIE!" AGant hopped around excitedly.

"Well... each spy has their own Secret Code that you must crack for them to dye the secret colors. There is a certain Spy named HanSu," Huma grinned, his brother would appreciate this, he though evilly, remembering all the times HanSu had gotten him bothered for non-existant "Special colors". "Well... you must first get his attention, you can do that by casting a Summoning spell on him, make sure he is busy first, or he may ignore you. Then, you must give him the Secret Code, he will act angry probably, but don't let him fool you, he is a Spy afterall."

"WHAT IS SECRET CODE? TEL ME PLZ PLZ!" AGant was still hopping around, it was very annoying.

"Well... since I like you, I'll tell you, it is exactly like this, Ugh. Huh? What? Duh." Huma spoke in gutteral terms he could probably understand, "Then, you must shout, right in his face, DYE ME NOW FOOL!" Huma stifled a laugh, "Good luck, do that exactly and you will see your orange dye."

"R YOU TRYING TO MAKE A FOOL OF ME? I NOW HANSU." He sounded agitated, Huma was losing him.

"Now, now, I know him too. He is my brother, and Kessalia's friend. Why would we want him disturbed if it wasn't for some greater good? A good such as your benefeit? He even may make you a Spy for cracking his code. Here, as brothers we possess some knowledge of the other." Huma remembered where HanSu said he was going, right about now he should be in Prince M'huls private chamber... "Let me speak with him and make sure he is busy." Huma looked as if he was in deep concentration and looked up, "Ahh... he is very busy at the moment, now is the time to summon him! Quickly!"

"YES YES!" AGant clasped his hands together. A bright light flashed and HanSu appeared in front of them. His surpise quickly turned to anger, and back to surpise again, AGant had started. "UGH. HUH? WHAT? DUH." Then the part the two were waiting for, "DIE ME NOW FOOL!" Followed by, "ORANGE PLZ PLZ!" He waited for the Orange dye to come.

HanSu looked positively baffled, he had been just about to get critical information from spying upon the Prince, when he had appeared here, in the Dae shore, with a lunatic dancing in front of him. He glanced around, and his eyes narrowed when they fell upon Huma, who was grinning at him. "Huma..."

AGant turned back, "HES NOT TALKING TO ME, SHOULD I KEEP DOING IT UNTIL HE DOES???" Without a nod from Huma and Kessalia, he repeated it.

HanSu turned and walked off, angry, AGant followed. In the trees beyond, they could still hear, "DIE ME ORANGE! MAKE ME A SPIE!!"

Kessalia and Huma turned to each other. "I can't believe that worked. Poor HanSu." Kessalia laughed. Huma couldn't talk, he was laughing so hard his ribs hurt.

Finally the shouts in the forest died out, and the laughter died down. "That was great, he deserved it." Huma laughed again, finally regaining his composure. Princess Neko walked over and began thanking them for the day's service.

Then the silence of the forest was shattered by AGant's voice, clearly, we could hear "WHAT?!" Branches rustled in the forest, out of the trees burst AGant. Kessalia and Huma turned and sighed, Princess Neko looked about questioningly.


Huma knew HanSu was joking, he wasn't a judge at any rate. Another rustle in the trees caught their attention, suddenly, Rabsha himself appeared! AGant shrieked and turned to run.

HanSu held up a finger to his mouth to be silent, he grinned out from his Rabsha disguise. "Prepare to go to jail insolent!" And he grabbed ahold of the wildly afraid AGant.

"I HATE U MUSES! U MUSES ARE EVIL! I HATE YOU!" He was still trying to break free, hurling curses freely at Kessalia and Huma. "WHY DO U HATE ME?! U R BAD MUSES!" AGant had gone berzerk.

Huma shouted, "You wanted Orange dye? Look at his clothes! He has plenty!"

HanSu released his grip on AGant, and AGant wisely whispered the words of a Return spell. The three all shared a laugh. Princess Neko was still confused, and they decided it would be best she stayed that way.

Kessalia looked at where AGant had stood sceaming at them, then at Huma. "We're Baaaad Mooses, aren't we?"

Huma shrugged, "Kiyone would be proud, Hehe."