Hidden Language of RP
In all of my travels throughout this land, I have heard from many people about a thing called 'Role Playing,' Commonly abbreviated as 'RP.' I made it my mission to find out what this 'RP' is and let the entire community know the hidden secrets to it!
What could it be?
Is it a quest given by the gods to only a chosen few?
Is it an item of great wealth, that could unleash a sinister fury on the land, or allow us to live in peace for centuries?
Is it a type of plant that when eaten allows us to communicate with our bottles of gin?
Of course it's not any of these! Gods are tres fickled, items of great wealth would never be used for either of the said reasons because whoever owned them would never let them into the light of day, much less use them, And of course noone can speak to gin, for I am the only man in the land that is able to make this liquid pleasure(Save for timmy, seeing as how he taught me the art) thus making the ability to speak to it limited to my flask or my stomach.
Now, for what it really is...
The 'uncultured' people of this land are the spawn of this 'roleplay' concept, spreading their filth and propaganda throughout the land! It is nothing more than their language. I shall call it 'The language of the peasants of f00' for it seems to be a fitting name for these pathetic fools that think they can pull the proverbial wool over MY eyes!
Now let me explain what i have seen.
The 'uncultureds', hereby referred to by x, attempt to sully all that is decent by using their language. they say things like 'Thou art getting on mine nerves, knave!' and 'My bum hurts!(())' It's very interesting. Let us look at the first sentance. after months of extensive research, i've found that this really means 'I'm going to steal your wife, can i have a quarter?' After even more research, i found that a quarter is not a quarter of a wife, but merely x's pathetic uncultured name for their own currency. It's preposterous that they would use anything other than our most revered coin! Now, as for the second paragraph, it seems that the (()) refers to either the act of hunting, a huntsman, or a really large fish...and the word 'bum' is actually their uncultured word for...bum!
I was appaled to find out this last fact, and it has made me wary of ever using that word in my vocabulary...
Some other commonly used phrases and their translations:
'Just standing around' -- This is actually a more polite way of saying '((Watching TV))'...And from the best I can deduct, TV is short for The Vale, meaning they're watching their fellow man smite each other! How horrible...
'Plz Help Me I Wnt 2 be (=Enter Subpath Here=) I Ken RP!' --
This is the very new x's method of speech. Since they are new to the uprising, they have not mastered the idea of their language being secret, and gladly broadcast it to all that would like to hear.
I am still researching this phenomenon, and BE WARNED ALL OF YOU ROLEPLAY X's OUT THERE! I shall expose your ruse with grinning teeth!
On a final note, luckily, there is one phrase in their evil 'RP' Speak that translates to exactly the same thing in common speak...
'Hail. My name is Strikes.'
~Sukai no Sora~
~Provider of Fine Gin~
~Muse of Paste and Propaganda~
~THE most uninformed person in the nexus~